Most posts are fake, they claim

[Mohan]

My brother, cousin, friend or I earn 40-50 LPA, look decent, yet we're not getting proposals or the right woman. The confusion comes when you hunt for a perfect match. If you're earning over 30 LPA and are above 6 ft, you're already in the top 1% - there's no reason you shouldn't get matches. In small towns people marry even with 5-6 LPA.

I also saw a post yesterday where a guy asked if a tattoo is a red flag. He has over 400 matches on Bumble and Tinder. If guys like that join AM, you'll see that even people who can get LM end up in AM because of parents or other reasons.

Many of these posts are just click‑bait and made up.

[Suresh]

These are the same guys who mess around and end up in AM too - the one who posted about tattoos yesterday.

[Jayant]

Attended a close relative's wedding - the groom was a 28‑year‑old who's unemployed, never had a job, and only has about 3‑4 bigha of ancestral land.

[Isha]

I earn >50 LPA but only get one match a week. Maybe I'm just ugly.

[Dayanand]

The thing is, many women have already dated the top 20% of men and now prefer to stay single. Those of us who waited a long time get ridiculed by both the women who've had their share of past relationships and the men who've been with them.

[Arif]

I show my package as above 30 LPA and I'm in my late‑20s, but I barely get any matches on matrimonial apps. If you think this is fake, I don't know what to tell you. My parents have probably sent my biodata to 300‑400 families in our caste WhatsApp group. The girls' biodata gets posted there and my profile is shared too. Over 80% reject me outright because I'm based in Bangalore.

[Aarohi]

I have a decent profile, but my work location seems to be a problem for some. I manage about two good matches each week.

[Ravindra]

This sounds a bit jealous and spiteful. Let me break it down.

First, people who are in the AM market aren't there because they can't find love matches. Everyone has different values and looks for different things in a life partner. Just because you never dated doesn't mean others can't.

I chose an arranged marriage because I'm used to a certain standard of living, thought process, vocabulary and ideals - I didn't want to compromise. My cousin went for it after a ten-year relationship ended amicably; he wanted a partner who matches his career goals. My brother prefers AM because his job is so busy he has no time to date actively, even though he's dated before.

I've never been in a relationship and I don't care how many partners my future spouse had. I have a large circle of female friends and none of them mind. You should drop the idea that AM is only for people who don't look good.

Now about the so‑called top 1% - your assumption is wrong. Even people in that group struggle. Everyone has minimum standards. A person raised in a metro city with tier‑one education, family wealth, a good career and good looks will not settle for less. AM is about finding someone who fits into that picture.

It's never just about money. I once got a rishta from a guy earning 1.5 crore abroad, but he was a narcissistic jerk and I hated his mother's comments after a call. I said no on day three. He was rich, tall and good looking. I later married someone who earns much less but has an amazing moral character, and I absolutely love my in‑laws.

Girls (and most guys) in AM are very picky - rightly so, it's a lifetime decision. You cannot dictate who can or cannot be in AM. As long as you're not in a committed relationship while looking, and you decide on exclusivity before dating seriously, you're fine. (My partner and I didn't talk about exclusivity until the fourth month of talking, and we talked for nine months before getting married.)

[Jayant]

Why are you targeting me? I have no issue with anyone's earnings or how many matches they get. I don't see the point. This is my personal life; I'm not obliged to explain my choices to strangers. I can date and decide between AM or LM. For people like you, I had to set my account to private.

[Naresh]

Looks can spark attraction, but they can't sustain a long‑term partnership.

Someone may be good‑looking or seem relatable, but if they disrespect you, cut you off, don't let you finish a sentence, or show no real interest, that's a problem.

Good looks may pull you in at first, but daily life runs on respect, communication, curiosity and partnership.

So yes, attraction matters, but if the person can't hold a decent conversation or treat you properly, looks won't save the relationship.

[Nath]

Already earning above 50 LPA, but the matches are dead. I stay physically active through sports, thanks to an athletic build.