18F: Dad says I should be a prostitute for asking a strap top

[Deepak]

I'll keep it brief because I can't share this with anyone offline. I asked my dad for a strappy top and shorts I saw online. He started lecturing me, saying I've changed, that such revealing clothes show my shoulders, neck, cleavage and underarms. He claimed only prostitutes or actresses wear stuff like that because they earn money that way, and reminded me that clothes should cover the body, not expose everything like the top I showed.

I told him politely that it's scorching hot and other girls my age wear similar outfits. He lost his temper, told me to join prostitution to earn money, said I should quit studying, that working like that will bring more cash, and called me spoiled, a male‑attention seeker, a potential sex worker and more.

What broke me the most is that even after I scored 91% in my 12th board exams, he still uses that language.

[Prem]

This is completely abusive and not okay! For the heat, wear cotton, linen or other natural fabrics - especially loose ones - they help a lot.

[Adarsh]

I'm really sorry you had to go through this. You could try cotton sleeveless maxi dresses; they're cool for the heat. Maybe tell him you'll wear it only at home, not outside. I'm sorry he called you those names. He'll regret it. Don't ask for such stuff again; it will only hurt you. Once you're independent, you can buy it yourself.

[Farhan]

That's it, I'm leaving this subreddit.

[Rajesh]

My mom has said similarly messed‑up things too.

[Lakshmi]

I can relate, but I'm not sure how to support or uplift you. I hope you can move out soon.

[Vinod]

My dad is the same and I'm 21F. Sorry you're going through this. I hope you can study well and leave the house. It's not worth the trauma and suffering.

[Varunesh]

Feels like I'm reading my own story. I get you, sister. It won't get better unless you leave the house. I stopped talking to my dad and that's the best decision I've made in a while.

[Falguni]

I completely agree he was wrong. What he said was downright obnoxious.

You need to start standing up to him. I heard he didn't let you move out for college either. If you don't start rebelling now, you might still be under his control even after you're 25. That's all I have to say.

[Rajendra]

It might be safer to go along with your father's wishes for now and avoid any major confrontation, especially when there's no other family around.

Stay close to other relatives, be nice to them, and keep your distance from your dad as much as possible. You have good grades, so be patient, finish your studies, get a stable income and then move out.

[Jasmin]

First of all, I'm really sorry you had to hear that. A few suggestions:

1. You're young right now and if your family follows whatever your dad says, try not to involve them too much in your personal choices to protect your peace.

2. Since he has regressive views and doesn't trust your potential, either fight back and earn it (this works if you have support from other family members, especially a female) or wait until your studies finish and then gradually move out. We need to break the trauma and protect our future. He'll likely try to control you even as an adult.

3. As you start college, avoid getting into a relationship until you're sure your decisions are yours. Parents sometimes cage their kids over relationships. Study hard, get a good job, and once you're financially stable and out of the house, life will be a lot easier on your own terms.

Hope this helps. ❤️