Friend disappears with ₹20-25L loan & credit card debt; need legal advice

[Damini]

I don't know what to do anymore and I'm posting this because I genuinely need help and practical advice. Please don't judge me for trusting someone too much. I already regret it every single day.  This happened with one of my closest friends - someone I trusted like family for more than 5 years. We were extremely close, almost like brothers. We used to help each other financially whenever needed.  Whenever he asked for money, I would lend it, and he was always very punctual in returning it. If he said 2 days, he would return in 2 days. He also helped me in difficult situations before.  Because of years of trust, we became the kind of friends who would even help each other with loans if needed.  Later, he started a construction/business venture and started needing larger amounts of money. Since he had always been trustworthy and reliable for years, I never doubted him.  Slowly over time:  - I lent him large amounts of money through bank transfers.   - He took loans in my name.   - He used credit cards in my name and took money through them.   - I gave him money that I personally saved over time.   - I invested money into another trading/business opportunity only because he personally guaranteed it. I didn't know the third person involved - I trusted him completely because he told me he would take responsibility if anything happened.  Initially, everything was normal. He paid EMIs properly. He returned money whenever promised. So naturally, I never suspected anything.  Then suddenly something major happened in his construction/business and everything changed.  At first, I understood because I genuinely believed he was going through a hard financial time.  But slowly:  - He stopped paying money back.   - He stopped paying properly.   - He stopped answering messages and calls.   - He avoided meeting us.   - Eventually, he completely disappeared.  Whenever we tried to meet him, he would avoid us. We even went to his house multiple times.  His parents kept saying:  > "We don't know where he is."  > "Don't worry, we will pay."  > "We'll settle it next month."  But every month became another month.  Now it has been almost 2 years and nothing has changed.  My other close friend is also affected in the same situation and lost around ₹9-10 lakhs because of trusting him.  The worst part is what happened with my family.  I had saved money for my brother's marriage, and I had given even that money to him because he promised he would return it.  When the marriage came, he still didn't return my money.  At that point, I had no option.  I convinced my family to take a loan against our house to manage marriage expenses because I genuinely believed he would repay soon.  I promised my family:  > "I'll get the money back from him in 3-4 months and close this."  Because even at that time, he promised me:  > "I don't have money now, but I'll settle everything in 4-5 months."  I trusted him again.  That was another mistake.  Now the house we live in is under loan.  I'm paying EMIs for:  - Loans taken in my name because of him   - Credit card debt he used   - Personal liabilities created because he never returned the money   - House-related loan burden that happened because repayment never came  The total liability has now become ₹20-25 lakhs+ and it keeps growing every month because of EMIs and interest.  Around 80-90% of my salary goes into EMIs.  For the last 2 years:  - I haven't been able to enjoy my own salary despite earning decently.   - I can barely buy anything for myself.   - I had to sell a car I bought for my father to settle some liabilities.   - I feel mentally exhausted, frustrated, and financially trapped.  What hurts me most is this:  He knew everything.  He knew my family situation, responsibilities, financial struggles, everything.  He knew exactly what would happen to me if he disappeared.  Still, he chose to completely stop responding and leave us drowning.  We never cheated him. We never used him.  All we did was help him because we genuinely believed we were building a better future together.  Instead, he disappeared.  The only contact we have now is through his father.  But here's another complication:  His father is a retired police officer and has strong police connections.  This scares us from taking legal action because we are ordinary people without any influence or contacts.  We are scared that if we go legally, nothing will happen or things may turn against us.  What proof I currently have:  - Bank transfer records   - Loan records in my name   - Credit card statements   - EMI payment records   - Financial transaction history  What I DON'T have:  - No written agreements   - No signed contracts   - No call recordings   - Most old chats/call records are gone because this started almost 2 years ago  At this point, I genuinely don't know what to do anymore.  I somehow need to recover this money because I don't have any other option.  I'm mentally exhausted and I feel trapped because every month the liabilities keep growing.  I'm looking for realistic and practical advice, not judgment.  My questions:  1. Do I still have a legal case in India with only bank transfers, loan documents, EMI records, and credit card statements?   2. Can a money trail itself become evidence even without written agreements?   3. Should I stop waiting for his father's promises and take legal action?   4. Should I first send a legal notice, file a police complaint, or go for a civil recovery case?   5. Does his father being a retired senior police officer make legal action risky or difficult?   6. Has anyone here recovered money in a similar situation?   7. If you were in my situation, what would realistically be your next step?  Please help.

[Sangeeta]

bro I am no expert but you need to go full legal case on friend & his family, sue them for everything till the last penny and until you win you need to hold on to the EMIs you're paying

[Tarun]

NEVER lend any money more than one's one month salary, THATS THE GOLDEN RULE

[Sanjay]

I have someone who can help you, let's connect

[Yash]

Is this ragebait?

[Suresh]

Contact a lawyer. If you have paid via bank transfer there are some mechanisms you can use.

[Sachin]

Don't call him best friend first

[Kavitha]

Not the same in terms of amount, lost only 20K though I don't make a lot myself. I am very frugal and used to save and invest most of my salary, but now that I wanna do a post graduate course, my savings are all that I have for transport and living expenses for these two years without income. I asked for the money back, he said he won't be able to repay a penny as he has nothing. He earns much more than me, his wife earns too.  The loss of 20k does not bother me as much as the realisation that apparently 20k is worth more than the friendship we had, his honor, integrity and self respect. Scares me how selfish and shameless humanity becomes once things are about money

[James]

Wow..  I thank myself for even splitting 100 rs bills with my friends now..

[Mukesh]

Friendship means nothing to people. One guy was super friendly and helpful and I asked him for 850 for key change and he never returned that. The worst part is after that day, he stopped talking to me too. So I would rather destroy friendships without giving money than giving money

[Pratik]

I would be going to court because:  1. I'm not a legal expert, so I don't know if you'll be winning in court or not but anyways you're not going to get your money back so why not give it a shot.  2. Court creates a psychological and mental pressure and most probably they would also prefer to avoid it and they will start taking your threat seriously