Is ego the main reason wedding got cancelled? 26F & 29M

[Satish]

So our wedding was arranged and we had barely a month to plan. We had spent time together, hugged and kissed. Then the shopping started and during one of his trips I told him to buy whatever he wanted, saying I'd pay but not spend 1‑2 lakhs. I joked that the guys' outfits should cost less than the girls', otherwise it's a shame on the guys, and I said that to his mom, him and his brother. When they asked about the budget I was angry for many reasons and slipped my tongue. The next day they called off the wedding without even discussing it with me. I texted him a hundred times, apologising, saying I was on my period and had mood swings, and asked to talk and sort it out, but he refuses to meet or talk, saying he isn't mature enough to take such things lightly, he's serious, and he ended it three weeks before the engagement.

[Jasmin]

How much did it cost you?

[Ayaan]

Your comment about the outfit budget, made publicly to his family, came across as disrespectful and was a clear red flag for compatibility. It led them to cancel the wedding without discussion. Ego played a part, but it also exposed deeper mismatches in respect and maturity that he, at 29, isn't willing to overlook despite your apologies. Mood swings from periods explain the behavior but don't excuse it, and bombarding him likely hardened his stance. It's best to stop reaching out, rely on family for new matches, and be glad the engagement ended now rather than later, as many arranged weddings in India do when similar slips happen.

[Norman]

It wasn't just about money; it was how they treated me during the shopping trips. After the gold shopping, the guy started nagging for two weeks because I didn't pick what his mom chose. The budget was already decided by the families, and I accepted that, but the tension resurfaced during the clothing shopping because of that baggage.

[Nandini]

You can use ChatGPT to phrase this better. Anyway, I don't get why the groom's family usually bears the cost of jewellery and the lehenga.

[Suresh]

You should be glad they called off the match. Think about it: he couldn't handle a small issue around money, imagine the problems after marriage if he and his family don't understand financial matters. It wasn't just ego; it was a money mindset. His ego got bruised when you messaged him a hundred times saying sorry and asking to talk. If he were truly serious and mature, he wouldn't act like this. Look on the bright side and be happy now.

[Ganesh]

Women today expect equality and the same level of respect. So the guy's outfit doesn't have to cost less than the woman's. It sounds a bit sexist to assume that. I understand you have a budget, but within the same budget the guy's outfit may end up costing more or less. It might be better to look for a partner who shares your values.

[Pradeep]

Behen, kya bolna chahti ho?

[Shyam]

There are consequences to a loose tongue; being on your period or having mood swings is no excuse.

[Bharat]

You sound like someone with many past relationships. If you can talk so casually with your man, why not choose one of your exes to marry?

[Nikita]

Whatever the reasons—childhood issues, societal pressure—arguments happen in couples. But reacting like that is a huge red flag. If a similar fight arises later, will they consider divorce? I recall a Japanese couple where the husband didn't speak to his wife for over ten years over a small matter. Some people mix ego with self‑respect and boundaries. Understanding boundaries is a whole different conversation. Take this as a sign, girl.