Hey folks, looking for advice from both guys and girls on how you single people manage your urges. I've never been in a relationship; I've tried dating but I keep getting ghosted-maybe because I'm simple. I live in Gurgaon, work in IT, originally from a small town. Lately my craving for female touch (not sex) has shot up. Sometimes I think of going to a spa for a service, but then I pull back and try to distract myself. I feel guilty, thinking I might cheat on a future wife if I ever find one. I masturbate when the urge hits, but I still miss the physical touch of a woman.
How do you all handle this?
Girls, please share your thoughts. If you found out your partner had done something like this in the past, how would you react? I know it's not acceptable, but I'm curious.
Our own hands, Jagannath!
Set a clear goal in life. The more you chase women, the less interested they become. Nothing is more attractive than a man with a purpose and passion.
Connect with God; having something bigger than yourself and strong morals helps you control yourself.
Stay busy-find work, avoid endless scrolling, and consume good content. Try to stay away from Reddit; it's full of people who promote mindless jerking and have no direction.
Cultivate good friends who are also working towards something.
I've tried pure dating apps and had a casual hookup twice.
Change your environment-move to a new city or country, meet new people. Masturbation can lead to emptiness and depression.
Those urges are normal; they just mean you're human. Don't let them control you. Don't, I repeat, don't go to a spa for a 'service' just to get that touch-it will only leave you feeling disgusted with yourself.
The only real solution is to wait. Wait until you meet a partner who is comfortable giving you that kind of touch. Wait until it feels natural, not something you do out of loneliness or lust.
If the urges become overwhelming, look at what triggers them-seeing a happy couple, feeling emotionally vulnerable, loneliness, or just plain horniness.
No one is controlling you; just go with the flow.
Bro, you're too good for this world.
I was single until I got married five years ago. I hadn't even experienced sex before, so I didn't have any urges. Of course I had some, but they disappeared after masturbating.
After having sex, my horniness shot up. If I go more than a week without sex, I start losing my mind.
What makes you think these urges can't be controlled?
I masturbate, but I think I've developed mental control over it.