I just finished my 6th and last attempt on May 24. I've been preparing for UPSC since 2017, starting at 22 years old. My first attempt was in 2018, and I cleared Prelims with 106 marks. I was ecstatic, but I failed in Mains, scoring 718 out of 756. I thought I was close, so I tried again. In 2019, my mom was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. I was devastated, but I still filled out forms for UPSC, NABARD Grade A and B, and RBI Grade B. I failed in all of them. When NABARD Grade A results came out, I was shocked to see I scored 128.25, just 0.75 marks shy of the 129 cutoff. I was heartbroken. I decided to pivot to IIFT MBA, but I didn't get a call for GDPI. In 2020, I cleared NABARD Grade A prelims but skipped Mains to focus on UPSC. I cleared UPSC Prelims with 101 marks, but I failed in Mains again. On March 23, 2021, I checked my results and didn't make it. I was crushed. My mom comforted me, and I went for a walk to clear my head. I cried uncontrollably. The next week was tough. In 2021, I cleared another government exam and joined a job. I skipped 2022 to adjust to my new job. In 2023 and 2024, I failed again. This year, I prepared from January to May and gave my 6th attempt. I'm relieved it's over. I'm not checking my scores. I'm just feeling cathartic. I can finally move on without regret.
bro u are an absolute hero
Koi fark nahi padta, Sabkuch jeet lene mein, Aur ant tak haar na manne mein ! Well done. These 6 attempts will help you in certain ways you will never be able to explain. But at the end you will realise it and smile back :)
Here I was thinking my LIFE IS BAD till now. Wishing you all the best for your future endeavours brother. You are brave and strong dont let anybody tell you otherwise.
SSB ke kitne attempts diye hai bhai?
Extremely emotional to read. Glad that your mom is alright now!
I don't have karma to make a post, so I'm posting here. Background: I have been in this cycle for three phases. In 2023, the paper was tough, but for the most part it was still based on conceptual understanding. It was my first attempt, so I gave the paper to test the waters. In 2025, the paper was on the moderate side. I cleared GS Paper 1 but neglected CSAT. That failure was completely my responsibility, and I accept that. But 2026 was invalid. The paper was vague, illogical, and filled with questions that were outside the expected scope of preparation. For the Illusionists: Now if any, 'yes sir' followers, or blind defenders of UPSC still believe this exam genuinely tests the qualities required in a bureaucrat, then they are living in an illusion. Hard Truths: 1. UPSC is no longer testing intelligence and aptitude the way people romantically claim it does. The exam today is increasingly testing memory retention (rote learning), guesswork, and luck instead of intelligence, administrative aptitude, or decision-making capability. An RTI shows that, 213 IAS officer trainees at LBSNAA will have to reappear for examinations as they failed the departmental exam between 2020 and 2026 due to poor performance across various assessments. First time in the history of this exam. Shows what kind of people have been selected in past years. 2. The examination is not fair or transparent. There are loopholes in the system. Possible selective high profile paper leaks. The children of politicians seem to navigate the exam with an ease out of nowhere, that ordinary aspirants can only observe from outside. 3. The interview is rigged. My friend's parents (distant relatives), both IAS, once told me that interview boards are far more predetermined than most aspirants are made to believe. The board members often have preferred candidates after the Mains exam because they have informal influence, networks that affect scoring. Uncle's batchmate was once a member of the commission. You can see that many people scoring exceptionally good in Mains are given below the average marks in interview, on purpose to pull up the ranks of other 'pre determined preferential candidates' so they get into the service. Bureaucrats' children have structural advantages during later stages of the process, especially upper caste people. 4. Commission hates the poor. The system selectively showcases success stories to preserve the image of meritocracy. Whenever someone from a poor background clears the examination, the media amplifies it heavily to reinforce the idea that the system is completely fair and accessible to everyone equally. Those stories are real and deserve appreciation, but they are used symbolically to maintain public faith in the examination structure which is corrupt from inside. At training institutes, you will see that most selected candidates are from good or elite colleges in the country, there's hardly any born below poverty line candidate. At the same time, politics and judiciary in this country are already family based institutions. You know already the collegium system and why so many vacant seats of judges. Bureaucracy is slowly moving in the same direction too. Slowly, it will lowkey become union of bureaucrats and politicians. 5. Accountability doesn't exist. In this country, accountability exists beautifully inside ethics papers, essays, speeches, and interview discussions but becomes invisible the moment institutions themselves are questioned. Even asking for transparency immediately gets labelled as bitterness, incompetence, or excuse-making. As the supreme court once said, you're all cockroaches. Conclusion: I'm out of this circus now. Hard work in the wrong place eventually becomes self-destruction. At some point, perseverance stops being resilience and starts becoming sunk-cost imprisonment. I never trusted this system because I have observed it closely enough to separate its mythology from its reality. And when something begins to resemble a performance more than a credible institution, sometimes it is better to step outside of it entirely rather than continue participating in the illusion. The union of bureaucrats just mocked you all, and there's nothing you can do about it. My suggestion: give this exam a few times, pre-decide the number of attempts, and do not move past that limit based on some YouTube motivational video you watched. They do select approximately two-thirds of people without predetermined judgment. The leftovers are the backdoor, hidden entries. But you will neither know nor believe it until something bigger than the Pooja Khedkar case happens. Save your youth, and if you can, leave the country the same way many high-net-worth individuals are settling abroad recently.
Veteran completes 6 UPSC attempts
Such an inspiring journey. Many aspirants spend their attempts without putting efforts in their preparation and regret later (like me). But you, after 6 attempts, have nothing to regret as in all the 6 attempts, you gave your best. That's an achievement in itself. Be proud sir. You have developed the endurance spirit that most of us dream of. I don't think your worth is anyway less to those who have actually cleared in those attempts. I don't know how much your mother may show it or not, but she is surely proud of you, like all of us.
The best part about this entire journey is u having a secured job today while ur mother witnessing ur life, couldn't be more happy for u OP. I lost my mother to stage 4 breast cancer 1 month before yesterday's prelims. The fact that she won't be witnessing whatever will happen further in my life, in physical essence is a kinda void till my last breath. Be close to ur mother and show her the world. Enjoy ur life without any regrets buddy. Godspeed
May I ask what job you're doing now?